So Ive thought about it

So much as happend between me and you. & everytime that something new happens, its always you the screw up and me that says sorry. Why do i always say it? Not because its my fault, but i want what happend to just vanish and get back to where we were before. But you know what, I've really been thinking about his. Why do i always have to be the one saying sorry. Why am i always the one saying the words its ohkay, i forgive you or don't worry about it. Why am i always the bigger one, and stepping up and forgiving you? You know what i think im done doing that. Yess, you are my best friend. But im not willing to be the only that tries to make this friendship work, if you really cared about this. You would meet me half way. Its like you dont even care anymoree. A friend recently just reminded me about some of the things that happend in the past. Like i didnt even remember them anymore. Cus i oviously tried to not let it get between anything. When she was talking to me about it, i was trying to keep a smile on my face and just shake it off. But you didnt know how much it hurt to hear it all over again. Too think that you listened to some other person over me. For you to take someone elses side over your own best friends? After all that we've been through, you still listened to her, and her bullshit that she talked about me. Not only did you not defend for me, but you listened to her. You listened to her and started other crap too. Reallly?! Is that what best friends really do to eachother? For all that youve done to me in the past i still forgave youu ? hmmm, i think thats pretty dumb of me. Its been 2 weeks since we havent talked and im still counting the days. Im not calling it quits, but im pretty damn close too. I have no idea why im still holding on. Holding on to someone who hurt me so much in the past, someone who doesnt even give a shit if she loses me or not. Why am i always the one waiting around. Why am i always the one trying ? Why am i always the one being the bigger person? Well you know what, not this time, not anymore. Its gonna be your turn. You can put these pieces back together, cus im done trying. Im done finding the pieces, im done trying to make it work. Its your turn. You can put back the puzzle now. Just because we call eachother besss doesnt really mean anything to me anymoree. Show me that you really want me as a bess. Dont just tell me, show me. After all, actions speak louder than words right?